Post by Pyro on Dec 24, 2005 22:13:20 GMT 10
[Pyro is standing in the middle of the ring with a mic in his hand as usual but this time the decoration of the ring is a little bit different. There is a Christmas tree in one of the ring corners and there are other Christmas decorations.]
Pyro: I've been thinking this past week...
[Someone from the crowd shouts: "Can you think at all, you stupid animal?"]
Pyro: Yes I can! And I am damn sure I can think better than all of you together...
[The crowd boo]
Pyro: You all should know that this time Devil Attack will be a little different.. It's the special christmas edition after all!
[Again someone from the crowd shouts: "Do you celebrate Christmas, you filthy monster?"]
Pyro: As a matter of fact I do and I am doing it according to one great tradition and not like you miserable idiots!
[The crowd boo]
Pyro: You morons never knew the meaning of this word did you?
[Someone shouts again: "I know the meaning you SOB! It's a tradition for you to get your ass kicked"]
Pyro: We are brave, huh? Since it's a tradition why don't you get on that ring and see what tradition it is...
[In less than a second Austin comes out of the crowd but trips himself up in the barrier for the crowd...]
Pyro: hahahahaha..... You little clumsy, drunken shit! I doubt that you can beat anyone right now!
Austin: You just wait!
Pyro: Oh, yeah! When I'm waiting I'll go to that Chistmas tree here and see if there isn't a present for you under it...
[Pyro goes over to the tree and in a sec he lifts a small present, well packed in black with Austin skulls and middle fingers on it]
Pyro: Seems to me that this is yours!
Austin: Really? What is it?
Pyro: I don't know why don you check it yourself?
[Pyro throws Austin his present and Austin grabs it. He opens it and it turns out to be a smashed empty can of beer...]
Pyro: Read the card!
Austin[reading]: "Drink less, play chess" ... Why you little SOB...
[Austin runs toward Pyro but the security gets him out of there...]
Pyro: Since we are on the subject... Why don't you all... yeah you backstage... that's right all of the wrestlers there... why don't you come and check for presents under the Christmas tree... Maybe you were good enough and Santa left a present for you too!
[The DUEW roster comes to the ring. The firts to find a present is Matt Hare... His present is something like a fake title belt from chocolate and the card attached says: "I know you miss your belt, you use this one until it's melt"]
Matt Hare: WTF?
[Matt however do not attack Pyro but his face can tell us a lot about what he wants to do in this very moment. The next one to find his present is Lemmy. He opens it and there is a guitar but with no strings and the note is: "Don't play guitar because you suck and curse your damn luck!"... Lemmy however tries to attack Pyro but the many guards there stops him of doing so...]
Pyro: What Lemmy? You didn't like the present? Blame Santa not me!
[Then Luda find out that he had received a picture of him and Lover with a sign "Ex-champions" on it and the card says: "The present tells it all"!]
Pro: get him down of the ring!!!
[The security gets Luda down of the ring before he does something... Then Lance finds his present which is cream for hair growth... The card says: "You might not have hair but the brain in you is also rare"... Lance quickly jumps towards Pyro and tries to hit him but Pyro ducks and the security gets Lance out of the ring]
Pyro: Isn't this fun?
[Jimmy find that his present is a lighter and the card is: "I hope that your tribe will discover the light and maybe in 1000 year learn how to write"]
Jimmy: I know how to write!
Pyro: Hahahahaha..... That was a good one!
[Jimmy is almost about to attack Pyro but seeing how many guards there are he decides not to try... The next to fid his present is Ballistic... The present is a mirror and the card reads: "Use this mirror every morning coz you are ugly and this is last warning"]
Ballistic: Thank you, man!
[Ballistic comes closer as if he is about to hug Pyro but instead he punch him i the face which brings Pyro to the ground. The audience cheer and Pyro gets back on his feet as Ballistic is taken out of the ring by the security]
Pyro: Some people don't like the truth but anyway...
[Then Brett finds his present which turns out to be a copy of the new Shawn Michaels' book and the note on the front page says: "You tried to reach for he top but Shawn Michaels helped you drop"]
Brett: My friend...
[He comes closer but Pyro realize that it's a trick which Ballistic already used and gives the security a signal to take him down of the ring and they grab him]
Brett: Little SOB! Wait till I get you!
Pyro: Yeah, yeah...
[The next to find a present is Joey Malone... His present is an empty plate of italian meal... The card says: "Your mother sent you this I hope you are not pissed"]
Pyro: Get him out quick!
[Joey runs towards Pyro but the security stops him. The next to find his present is Nicho Z. His present is a mic which isn't working and the card says: "Cut the crappy rhymes wait for better times"]
Nicho Z: What?
[Before he knows it he is down of the ring. The next who finds his present is Angie and her present is... A very nice leather coat and the card says: "Merry Christmas". Angie smiles...]
Angie: Thanks!
[As Pyro is about to answer her...]
Lover: You little SOB... I'll have your head on my wall you damn...
[Pyro turns and sees that Lover had found his present and had already opened it. The present was viagra pills and the card was: "I know you have some problems with your dick but this should help you get it up quick". The security gets Lover and takes him out before he does any damage.]
Pyro: I have to be more careful!
[The only ones left on the ring are BOD. Disturbed finds a t-shirt with a sign "Pyro is on fire" and the card is: "You'll feel it in the match for the title of the Deathmatch"]
Disturbed: That's lame!
Pyro: Jonny's is better!
[The present for Jonny is a little statue of him in a casket and a sign "Get ready for the next time" and the card says: "When you meet with Pyro again it will end your title reign"]
Jonny: We'll see about that!
Pyro: Gentlemen please get out of the ring. Don't make me make you...
Disturbed: You'll make us?
Pyro: Not me personally but my friends from the security!
[Jonny gives a sign to Disturbed and they both leave the ring which leaves only Animal and Pyro]
Animal: Why is there no present for me?
Pyro: There is actually! The present for you is my favourite one but you'll receive it on 26th of December in our match! Your present is a HELL OF A BEATING!
[The crowd boo as Pyro smiles and Animal is pissed]
Pyro: I've been thinking this past week...
[Someone from the crowd shouts: "Can you think at all, you stupid animal?"]
Pyro: Yes I can! And I am damn sure I can think better than all of you together...
[The crowd boo]
Pyro: You all should know that this time Devil Attack will be a little different.. It's the special christmas edition after all!
[Again someone from the crowd shouts: "Do you celebrate Christmas, you filthy monster?"]
Pyro: As a matter of fact I do and I am doing it according to one great tradition and not like you miserable idiots!
[The crowd boo]
Pyro: You morons never knew the meaning of this word did you?
[Someone shouts again: "I know the meaning you SOB! It's a tradition for you to get your ass kicked"]
Pyro: We are brave, huh? Since it's a tradition why don't you get on that ring and see what tradition it is...
[In less than a second Austin comes out of the crowd but trips himself up in the barrier for the crowd...]
Pyro: hahahahaha..... You little clumsy, drunken shit! I doubt that you can beat anyone right now!
Austin: You just wait!
Pyro: Oh, yeah! When I'm waiting I'll go to that Chistmas tree here and see if there isn't a present for you under it...
[Pyro goes over to the tree and in a sec he lifts a small present, well packed in black with Austin skulls and middle fingers on it]
Pyro: Seems to me that this is yours!
Austin: Really? What is it?
Pyro: I don't know why don you check it yourself?
[Pyro throws Austin his present and Austin grabs it. He opens it and it turns out to be a smashed empty can of beer...]
Pyro: Read the card!
Austin[reading]: "Drink less, play chess" ... Why you little SOB...
[Austin runs toward Pyro but the security gets him out of there...]
Pyro: Since we are on the subject... Why don't you all... yeah you backstage... that's right all of the wrestlers there... why don't you come and check for presents under the Christmas tree... Maybe you were good enough and Santa left a present for you too!
[The DUEW roster comes to the ring. The firts to find a present is Matt Hare... His present is something like a fake title belt from chocolate and the card attached says: "I know you miss your belt, you use this one until it's melt"]
Matt Hare: WTF?
[Matt however do not attack Pyro but his face can tell us a lot about what he wants to do in this very moment. The next one to find his present is Lemmy. He opens it and there is a guitar but with no strings and the note is: "Don't play guitar because you suck and curse your damn luck!"... Lemmy however tries to attack Pyro but the many guards there stops him of doing so...]
Pyro: What Lemmy? You didn't like the present? Blame Santa not me!
[Then Luda find out that he had received a picture of him and Lover with a sign "Ex-champions" on it and the card says: "The present tells it all"!]
Pro: get him down of the ring!!!
[The security gets Luda down of the ring before he does something... Then Lance finds his present which is cream for hair growth... The card says: "You might not have hair but the brain in you is also rare"... Lance quickly jumps towards Pyro and tries to hit him but Pyro ducks and the security gets Lance out of the ring]
Pyro: Isn't this fun?
[Jimmy find that his present is a lighter and the card is: "I hope that your tribe will discover the light and maybe in 1000 year learn how to write"]
Jimmy: I know how to write!
Pyro: Hahahahaha..... That was a good one!
[Jimmy is almost about to attack Pyro but seeing how many guards there are he decides not to try... The next to fid his present is Ballistic... The present is a mirror and the card reads: "Use this mirror every morning coz you are ugly and this is last warning"]
Ballistic: Thank you, man!
[Ballistic comes closer as if he is about to hug Pyro but instead he punch him i the face which brings Pyro to the ground. The audience cheer and Pyro gets back on his feet as Ballistic is taken out of the ring by the security]
Pyro: Some people don't like the truth but anyway...
[Then Brett finds his present which turns out to be a copy of the new Shawn Michaels' book and the note on the front page says: "You tried to reach for he top but Shawn Michaels helped you drop"]
Brett: My friend...
[He comes closer but Pyro realize that it's a trick which Ballistic already used and gives the security a signal to take him down of the ring and they grab him]
Brett: Little SOB! Wait till I get you!
Pyro: Yeah, yeah...
[The next to find a present is Joey Malone... His present is an empty plate of italian meal... The card says: "Your mother sent you this I hope you are not pissed"]
Pyro: Get him out quick!
[Joey runs towards Pyro but the security stops him. The next to find his present is Nicho Z. His present is a mic which isn't working and the card says: "Cut the crappy rhymes wait for better times"]
Nicho Z: What?
[Before he knows it he is down of the ring. The next who finds his present is Angie and her present is... A very nice leather coat and the card says: "Merry Christmas". Angie smiles...]
Angie: Thanks!
[As Pyro is about to answer her...]
Lover: You little SOB... I'll have your head on my wall you damn...
[Pyro turns and sees that Lover had found his present and had already opened it. The present was viagra pills and the card was: "I know you have some problems with your dick but this should help you get it up quick". The security gets Lover and takes him out before he does any damage.]
Pyro: I have to be more careful!
[The only ones left on the ring are BOD. Disturbed finds a t-shirt with a sign "Pyro is on fire" and the card is: "You'll feel it in the match for the title of the Deathmatch"]
Disturbed: That's lame!
Pyro: Jonny's is better!
[The present for Jonny is a little statue of him in a casket and a sign "Get ready for the next time" and the card says: "When you meet with Pyro again it will end your title reign"]
Jonny: We'll see about that!
Pyro: Gentlemen please get out of the ring. Don't make me make you...
Disturbed: You'll make us?
Pyro: Not me personally but my friends from the security!
[Jonny gives a sign to Disturbed and they both leave the ring which leaves only Animal and Pyro]
Animal: Why is there no present for me?
Pyro: There is actually! The present for you is my favourite one but you'll receive it on 26th of December in our match! Your present is a HELL OF A BEATING!
[The crowd boo as Pyro smiles and Animal is pissed]
