Post by Joseph Malone on Jul 7, 2006 2:17:18 GMT 10
The start of "All Along the Watchtower" plays through the speakers and Joey Malone walks out, Australian title around his waist. He turns around right at the top of the ramp and looks back as his music slows down and then "Alrite" by Supergrass plays out, Julio and Hare walking out with their tag team titles. Hare leads the group down and they enter the ring, all three taking up mikes as their music cuts off
Joey: "I must say, it feels damn good..."
The crowd start to cheer in anticipation of Joey's comment
Joey: "...to have an entire month break from the morons that make up these crowds"
Joey laughs and strokes his chin at the crowds negative reaction, while Hare steps forward to speak
Hare: "But seriously and I speak for all three of us, I am glad to be back in front of this crowd and back in front of the Australian people..."
The crowd give him a bit of canned applause
Hare: "...it just makes me feel alive being up here, knowing that I am better than all of you our there"
The crowd stops the applause and starts booing again
Hare: "And poor, Julio, gosh you shoulda seen him crying every night while we were away. The kid has such poor selm esteem..."
The crowd cheers sarcastically
Hare: "...and not being in front of you guys made him realise what was missing in his life. He was depressed for about a month..."
Julio nods comically and the crowd laughs more
Hare: "...and you know who I blame this on, I blame it on the people over at McDonalds"
The crowd boos the mention of the name
Julio: "Oh you may think its funny, but I didn't. Thats why I sent the bill for my Xanax tablets to Peter Bush, CEO of McDonalds Australia and he sent back a letter and it was quite mean"
Hare: "Thats right, it basically said that Julio was a little child who nobody took seriously"
Joey: "But he did send us McDonalds vouchers..."
Hare: "...Which we gladly used and ate"
Joey: "...but the concept is still the same. McDonalds didn't take DUEW seriously, they didn't take me seriously and then they didn't take Julio Gonzalez seriously. So we decided to pay them a visit"
Joey points to the titantron and a video begins to roll, which plays full screen over the television
-----------
The video begins to roll and we see it is early morning in front of an office block. The camera zooms in and we see Joey Malone, wearing a pale blue shirt with grey trousers and suit, Matt Hare, wearing a white dress shirt and black pants, and Julio, wearing a purple tie with a purple shirt and black trousers. Julio has an envelope in his hand, and a slightly worried look on his face
Julio: "You guys got my back in there?"
Joey: "Look man, there is no need to worry"
Matt: "Lets go then"
The three men walk inside and next scene shows them walking into an elevator. The elevator goes up and then we see them walking down a hallway. Hare and Joey continue walking as Julio stops at a window and peers in. The room is dark and there is a man strapped down on a chair, with two more interrogating him
Interrogator 1: "So...are you going to give us what we want?"
Man: "Never...you can burn in hell!"
Interrogator 2: "You want to play the hard way do you?"
Interrogator 1: "Look, this is your last chance, tell us the secret to making good tasting food or else, your gonna get the Double Bacon 'n' Beef Burger treatment"
Man: "I'd rather...DIE"
The camera goes back to Julio, whose face becomes shocked as an anguished scream is heard. Julio turns away and gulps, before hurrying down the hallway to join Matt and Joey, who were just entering the office
Julio: "You know guys I could have sworn I just saw a guy getting tortured back there"
Joey: "Oh yeah, I bet he was getting fed Maccas. Grow up Julio...Mister Bush, we are the guys from Down Under Extreme Wrestling"
The shot turns from Joey and Julio to show a man, sitting in a chair with his back turned. There is no response, so Joey speaks again
Joey: "Mister Bush?"
A deep, breathy voice drawls a reply
Bush: "It seeeeeemmmss...that you...were per...haps moooore...of...a match...than i first...could have...thought"
Julio: "I just want an apology man"
Bush gets up and we see he is wearing full Ronald McDonald attire, face paint, wig and boots all in place. He bounds over the room but the three men quickly take him down and kick him, before ripping apart his costume. They dust themselves off and leave the room and Mister Bush on the ground.
------
The video fades out and returns to the arena, where much of the crowd is laughing, as well as the three guys in the ring
Joey: "Well we were escorted out by some Cheeseburger wielding security guards and we decided to take it upon ourselves to remedy our little problems with the good people of McDonalds"
Hare: "Thats why we have invited a certain person to join World Class Lineup. So without further delay, please give a warm welcome to Ronald McDonald everybody"
A circus type tune starts to play and a high pitched voice starts singing "I am a faggot", over and over, until a dejected Ronald enters the ring and is given a mike
Ronald: "Hey Matt, Hey Joey, Hey little boy! Whats your name?"
Ronald goes up to Julio and crouches down to him, smiling
Ronald: "Well it really has Macced my day to be here with you all"
Ronald goes to shake Hare's hand but Matt simply leans back on the ropes and shakes his head. Ronald looks shocked and tries to reason with Matt, while Joey has lit up a cigarette. Ronald shrugs and goes towards Joey instead but then sees the cigarette
Ronald: "Hey mister! Thats naughty! Smoking is bad for you, especially if you want to grow up big and strong like me!"
Ronald smiles to the cameras and gives a thumbs up. Joey approaches him, stamps on his foot and flicks the cigarette at his face, before slapping him. Ronald goes stumbling back right in front of Julio, who whips him to the ground by his hair. Hare beckons for a chair to be passed up to him. The ring crew obliges and hands him a brown McDonalds bag too
Julio: "Are you still loving it, fancy man?"
Joey and Julio pull him up and Matt hits him with a steel bullet right on the head, knocking him out cold
Joey: "Look what you made us do, Ron. Are you McHappy now?"
Joey smiles and grabs the bag and pulls out a few burgers, rips the wrappers off and shoves them into Ronalds mouth. "Alright" plays and the three members play up to the crowd, who are in a frenzy of cheers at the sight of the fallen Ronald McDonald
Joey: "I must say, it feels damn good..."
The crowd start to cheer in anticipation of Joey's comment
Joey: "...to have an entire month break from the morons that make up these crowds"
Joey laughs and strokes his chin at the crowds negative reaction, while Hare steps forward to speak
Hare: "But seriously and I speak for all three of us, I am glad to be back in front of this crowd and back in front of the Australian people..."
The crowd give him a bit of canned applause
Hare: "...it just makes me feel alive being up here, knowing that I am better than all of you our there"
The crowd stops the applause and starts booing again
Hare: "And poor, Julio, gosh you shoulda seen him crying every night while we were away. The kid has such poor selm esteem..."
The crowd cheers sarcastically
Hare: "...and not being in front of you guys made him realise what was missing in his life. He was depressed for about a month..."
Julio nods comically and the crowd laughs more
Hare: "...and you know who I blame this on, I blame it on the people over at McDonalds"
The crowd boos the mention of the name
Julio: "Oh you may think its funny, but I didn't. Thats why I sent the bill for my Xanax tablets to Peter Bush, CEO of McDonalds Australia and he sent back a letter and it was quite mean"
Hare: "Thats right, it basically said that Julio was a little child who nobody took seriously"
Joey: "But he did send us McDonalds vouchers..."
Hare: "...Which we gladly used and ate"
Joey: "...but the concept is still the same. McDonalds didn't take DUEW seriously, they didn't take me seriously and then they didn't take Julio Gonzalez seriously. So we decided to pay them a visit"
Joey points to the titantron and a video begins to roll, which plays full screen over the television
-----------
The video begins to roll and we see it is early morning in front of an office block. The camera zooms in and we see Joey Malone, wearing a pale blue shirt with grey trousers and suit, Matt Hare, wearing a white dress shirt and black pants, and Julio, wearing a purple tie with a purple shirt and black trousers. Julio has an envelope in his hand, and a slightly worried look on his face
Julio: "You guys got my back in there?"
Joey: "Look man, there is no need to worry"
Matt: "Lets go then"
The three men walk inside and next scene shows them walking into an elevator. The elevator goes up and then we see them walking down a hallway. Hare and Joey continue walking as Julio stops at a window and peers in. The room is dark and there is a man strapped down on a chair, with two more interrogating him
Interrogator 1: "So...are you going to give us what we want?"
Man: "Never...you can burn in hell!"
Interrogator 2: "You want to play the hard way do you?"
Interrogator 1: "Look, this is your last chance, tell us the secret to making good tasting food or else, your gonna get the Double Bacon 'n' Beef Burger treatment"
Man: "I'd rather...DIE"
The camera goes back to Julio, whose face becomes shocked as an anguished scream is heard. Julio turns away and gulps, before hurrying down the hallway to join Matt and Joey, who were just entering the office
Julio: "You know guys I could have sworn I just saw a guy getting tortured back there"
Joey: "Oh yeah, I bet he was getting fed Maccas. Grow up Julio...Mister Bush, we are the guys from Down Under Extreme Wrestling"
The shot turns from Joey and Julio to show a man, sitting in a chair with his back turned. There is no response, so Joey speaks again
Joey: "Mister Bush?"
A deep, breathy voice drawls a reply
Bush: "It seeeeeemmmss...that you...were per...haps moooore...of...a match...than i first...could have...thought"
Julio: "I just want an apology man"
Bush gets up and we see he is wearing full Ronald McDonald attire, face paint, wig and boots all in place. He bounds over the room but the three men quickly take him down and kick him, before ripping apart his costume. They dust themselves off and leave the room and Mister Bush on the ground.
------
The video fades out and returns to the arena, where much of the crowd is laughing, as well as the three guys in the ring
Joey: "Well we were escorted out by some Cheeseburger wielding security guards and we decided to take it upon ourselves to remedy our little problems with the good people of McDonalds"
Hare: "Thats why we have invited a certain person to join World Class Lineup. So without further delay, please give a warm welcome to Ronald McDonald everybody"
A circus type tune starts to play and a high pitched voice starts singing "I am a faggot", over and over, until a dejected Ronald enters the ring and is given a mike
Ronald: "Hey Matt, Hey Joey, Hey little boy! Whats your name?"
Ronald goes up to Julio and crouches down to him, smiling
Ronald: "Well it really has Macced my day to be here with you all"
Ronald goes to shake Hare's hand but Matt simply leans back on the ropes and shakes his head. Ronald looks shocked and tries to reason with Matt, while Joey has lit up a cigarette. Ronald shrugs and goes towards Joey instead but then sees the cigarette
Ronald: "Hey mister! Thats naughty! Smoking is bad for you, especially if you want to grow up big and strong like me!"
Ronald smiles to the cameras and gives a thumbs up. Joey approaches him, stamps on his foot and flicks the cigarette at his face, before slapping him. Ronald goes stumbling back right in front of Julio, who whips him to the ground by his hair. Hare beckons for a chair to be passed up to him. The ring crew obliges and hands him a brown McDonalds bag too
Julio: "Are you still loving it, fancy man?"
Joey and Julio pull him up and Matt hits him with a steel bullet right on the head, knocking him out cold
Joey: "Look what you made us do, Ron. Are you McHappy now?"
Joey smiles and grabs the bag and pulls out a few burgers, rips the wrappers off and shoves them into Ronalds mouth. "Alright" plays and the three members play up to the crowd, who are in a frenzy of cheers at the sight of the fallen Ronald McDonald
