sunburn results 12/5/06

[nicho]

The DUEW video and theme song begin to play, as both fade out the camera cuts to the Arena, Green and gold Fireworks start going off everywhere and then the Camera pans the crowed and they are cheering madly, all sorts of DUEW signs are held up, then the camera cuts to the Announcers table

Tom C: HELLO everyone, welcome to a big night of friday night sunburn, im Tom C along side my partner in crime.. Jonathon 'JJ' Jefferies!

JJ: hello tom and heelo to you all, DUEW is the place to be right now.. Damn we got another huge night ahead for you all!

Tom C:Yes, It just gets better and better every week, i know i say this alot, but its so true....

JJ: Well Our first match is coming right up, so lets cut straight to the ring where our Ring Announcer is standing by...

*Camera cuts to the ring*

Ring Announcer: This first contest is scheduled for 1 fall, Making his way to the ring at this time, weighing in at 250lbs, and standing at 6'1, from napoli italy, DUEW's australian champion.... Joey Malone!

(crowed boo)

All Along the Watchtower" by Jimi Hendrix plays around the arena and Joey Malone comes out, wearing green and red, half length ring tights. He walks down the ramp and into the ring, ready for action

Ring Announcer: and his opponent, weighing in at 285lbs, and stands at 6'9, from Victoria Texas... Lemmy Campbell

(crowed cheer)

"Stand" on "Motorhead" hits the hall. A motorcycle is heard and the ramp is lighten by many lights in different colors. Then Lenny goes through the ramp with his Harley. He stops next to the ring and turn off the bike. After that he goes on the ring with a guitar on his back and six beer cans. After that he goes on the turnbuckles and throws five from the six beers at the audience. He opens the last one lifted in the air to the audience.

*The crowed begin to chant lemmy's name as they lock up in the centre of the ring, Lemmy then gets Joey straight into an arm lock, Joey then counters it and has Lemmy in the arm lock, lemmy quickly gets out of it and pulls off a great belly to belly suplex, Joey makes it to his feet quickly and they both stand off and stare and the crowed roar in the background!

Tom C: Nice counter by lemmy!

JJ: and nice quick reaction by Joey!

*Both men go to lock up again but Joey then out smarts lemmy with a dirty tactic and eye rakes him, Joey follows up with a number of knees to the gut, then he picks lemmy up and connects with a sidewalk slam!

Tom C: Side walk slam!

JJ: thats gotta hurt

Joey Malone keeps on stomping lemmy, the fans boo and then joey tells them all to "shut the fuck up" and they just boo even louder, Joey then pays full attension to a sign at ringside saying 'Joey sucks'... joey then yells to the fan holding the sign up, Joey adventully turns around to face lemmy but only to walk into a dropkick, and the crowed arupt into cheer, but joey gets to his feet fast and this time gets caught with a T-bone suplex

Tom C: T-BONE!

(crowed cheer even louder)

Lemmy makes his way to the furtherest conrer and starts to tune up for his finisher, "sweet chin music"... as he stomps his feet the crowed all stand on there feet and start bickering amongst each other!

Tom C: Julio is here!

JJ: he is in the main event tonight.. whats he doing out here now?

*Julio sneekly passes a pair of brass knuckles to Joey... Julio then makes his way up onto the apron and starts distracting the referee, the referee starts to make his way over to Julio but its to late because Lemmy hits the 'sweet chin music' on julio!

JJ: Goodnight julio!

(crowed jump to there feet )

*As lemmy turns around... 'WACK" a huge punch with brass knuckles on lays out lemmy like a bag of patatoes

(the crowed boo)

tom C: oh no, lemmy is going to get robbed... kick out lemmy.. please!

*ref makes the count... 1....2....3*

Ring Announcer: and the winner of the match, The Australian champion.. Joey Malaone

*crowed boo as "All Along the Watchtower" by Jimi Hendrix' hits the speakers and Joey celebrates for a quick 10 seconds then gets out of the ring and helps julio backstage*

JJ: What a match.. stay with us folks because straight after the break its the grudge match... sucky VS Hunter

****Commercial Break****

Tom C: We are back from the Commercial Break and Hunter has just made his way down to the ring and he is waiting for sucky!

Ring Announcer: Currently in the ring at this time, he is the DUEW arm wrestling Champion... The Hunter!

(crowed cheer)

Ring Announcer: and now making his way to the ring... Sucky....

*The camera is looking directly at the entrance way and sucky is no where to be seen, the crowed begin to boo and a DUEW official runs to the ring and whispers something in the ring Announcer ear*

Ring Announcer: ladies and Gentlemen it is my job to inform that Sucky will not be competing here tonight Because he has Failed to appear backstage, therefor your winner by forfit.... Hunter!

(crowed boo for sucky but then cheer as hunters music begins to play)

Tom C: the fans arnt happy about it, i think they wanted to see sucky get his ass kicked again!

JJ: yeah real disapointing but the bright side of it... Lover is taking on Nightmare after the break... dont go no where people!

****Comercial Break****

Many lights in different colors lighten the hall. After the music starts Mr. Lover comes out attended by 9 beautiful ladies. He poses on the ramp, before walking to the ring and all the ladies start to dance as he enters. Mr. Lover greet the audience from the top rope under many fireworks and he start to dance with the ladies. After few moments the music stop and the ladies kiss him for good luck. The ladies go back stage and he removes his hat ready for fight

JJ: “The words fan favourite are thrown around a lot, but I truly believe they suit Lover perfectly”

Tom C: “More like suck up, if you ask me”

Lights go out, a blue strobe light hits the ring and entranceway as "Ministry of Darkness" hits the arena. Nightmare slowly walks down to the ring. Nightmare walks to the ringpost on the left, looks down, the suddenly rasies arms in the air for lights to go back on. Nightmare and Lover circle each other for a little bit before moving in to lock up

JJ: “Well this freakish Nightmare has been inflicting himself on his opponents in the last two months with amazing prolificacy”

Tom C: “I don’t know what you just said, but I do know that this guy scares the crap out of me”

Nightmare easily overpowers Lover and throws him to the turnbuckle. Nightmare quickly follows up with some powerful punches thrown slowly. Lover is reeling but every time he tries to protect one part of his body Nightmare simply hits another.

JJ: “Nice strategy by Nightmare here”

Nightmare stops the beating, only to pull Lover from the corner onto his shoulders, before tossing him into the turnbuckle face first, hitting Snake Eyes. Lover stumbles out of the corner backwards and walks right into a Nightmare Super Night Choke. Nightmare holds him in the air for a good 10 seconds, before letting him fall hard to the floor.

JJ: “What brute strength by Nightmare there, he is really showing why he is one of the most hyped DUEW superstars of the year”

Tom C: “Not to mention most feared”

Nightmare lets out a freaky smile and pulls Lover up. He whips him to the ropes and as he comes back he scoops him up with one arm and drops down to hit a hard Sidewalk slam. Nightmare goes for the cover but Lover kicks out at two

JJ: “That was a really close call there, I think Lover really needs to get his head back into the game”

Nightmare still has his arm over Lover and as he goes to stand up he brings Lover with him, holding him under his arm. Nightmare drops to the floor again and hits another sidewalk slam. He goes for another cover but Lover kicks out right before the three

JJ: “Nightmare using good strategy here, just driving the wind out of Lover with every move he hits him with”

Nightmare licks his lips and shakes his head. He gets up again and has Lover under his arm but as he goes to drop Lover flips out and lands on his feet behind Nightmare. He quickly grabs his neck and whips down, hitting a neckbreaker

Tom C: “Uh oh, Lover is on the rebound here after that move”

JJ: “Its bought Lover some time to recover for sure, but will it be enough”

Tom C: “A win here, a loss there, what’s the difference to Lover? He gets to go backstage with those nine beautiful ladies either way!”

Lover has worked himself to his feet and as he turns he meets Nightmare. Nightmare goes for a big haymaker but Lover ducks and sprints to the ropes. He springboards off of them and goes flying back to hit a clothesline on Nightmare, sending him flying to his back. Lover goes for the cover but Nightmare kicks out.

JJ: “Some nice quick movement by Lover there and he is back in the driving seat now”

Lover pulls Nightmare up by his hair and hits some elbows on him but Nightmare overpowers him and lifts him up for a powerbomb, only for Lover to reverse it into a hurracanrana, sending Nightmare on his back in front of the turnbuckle.

Tom C: “Oh my lord, Lover has Nightmare down and out. This could be it!”

Lover climbs up the turnbuckle and points to the heavens before standing up to go for the Shooting Star Press but as he is going to jump his leg gives way and he crotches himself on the turnbuckle

JJ: “What happened there?”

Tom C: “Oh I see what happened. It was Pyro with a kendo stick again, get him Pyro, get him”

Pyro has whacked Lovers leg with the kendo stick and again hit him on the back. Nightmare has quickly gotten up and grabbed Lover by the throat. He uses all his strength and spins around, hitting a spinning chokeslam from the top of the turnbuckle. Nightmare quickly covers Lover and gets the three count and the win

JJ: “Well it’s all over now, what a shame, Nightmare keeps on winning and Lover loses again thanks to Pyro”

Tom C: “It looks like Pyro isn’t done here and neither is Nightmare”

The two men have dragged Lover to his feet and are hitting him with the stick and their fists. All of a sudden Lemmy hits the ring and he goes straight for Nightmare. The two men are brawling when suddenly Joey rushes the ring and goes to help his friend. The odds are evened by Jonny Stripes, who has come to stop Joey but then Julio takes out Jonny. Hunter rushes the ring to help out but gets jumped by Sucky, who was joining the fray from the other side of the ring. From the crowd Hare and Dizzy come, having a fistfight and taking it into the ring

JJ: “Look at all this chaos! It is madness, these men and oh…lets make that women!”

From the back Mrs and Miss Howard have come down and are catfighting all the way down the ramp and into the ring. It seems that there is complete chaos until “No Chance” blasts from the speakers and Mr. H comes down to restore order.

Tom C: “Uh oh, the boss is here”

Mr. H starts walking down the ramp but Brendan Howard quickly comes down and attacks his dad from behind. Eventually everyone is in the ring brawling, then the bodies start to fall. Jonny throws Julio out of the ring, before backdropping Joey out of there too. Miss Howard slaps Mrs Howard and she goes through the 2nd rope and out to the floor. Lover hurracanranas Pyro over the top, before Lemmy clotheslines Nightmare over the top. Brendan and Lover charges Mr. H and knock him from the ring, before Hunter clotheslines Sucky out. Hare is stuck in the ring by himself and begins fighting but gets ganged up on

JJ: “Look at the chaos of this situation”

Tom C: “What about Hare? Don’t worry about the chaos, worry about him being stuck in the ring by himself!”

In the end Hare gets thrown out by Disturbed, who military presses him over the top rope. The men in the ring are fired up and look ready to go some more but “In the End” hits the speakers and Nicho “Z” comes out with a mike’

Nicho: “I tell you what we got here boys and gals. We got 7 men and 1 woman who want to fight 7 other men and 1 woman. Well I tell ya’ll what, I got an idea for ya’ll. Right here we got our PPV for Genesis v Holocaust and here is what I envisage…”

Nicho “Z” is pacing up and down the stage and he starts to get the crowd into it

Nicho “Z”: “So to start off the night, I say we kick into a match that needs to be sorted out, a feud between two men and that is Hunter v Sucky in a HARDCORE MATCH!”

The crowd goes wild and starts a chant of Hunter, but that stops as Nicho starts to announce the next match

Nicho: “Then we are going to kick it up a notch when things get more than personal between a mother and a daughter, that’s right we are gonna have Miss Howard v Mrs. Howard…now Sydney, how d’ya like that?”

The crowd cheers again, although not as loud

Nicho: “Aight, I know you are gonna like this one. You see ever since House of Horrors, these two men haven’t had too many kind words to one another, that’s why I am booking Nightmare v Lemmy Campbell to fight one on one to decide who is the better man”

The crowd starts a “Lemmy” chant up, but it quickly dies as the announcements continue

Nicho: “Now I know a certain guy who will like this and that certain guy has to be our favourite sleaze bag, Mr. Lover and he will get a match against Pyro…”

The crowd cheers at this announcement

Nicho: “…But no ordinary match it will be. Oh no, you see Pyro has enjoyed using his little Kendo stick in the last few weeks. So here’s the deal ladies and gents. This match is going to be a Kendo Stick on a Pole match!”

The crowd goes wild yet again, however Pyro doesn’t look happy

Nicho: “But wait there is more, that’s right. Father and son are going to face off to choose who is more of a man. It’s a blood feud if there ever was one and these two men are going to sort it out in a ring

The crowd cheers but Nicho quickly moves on the schedule

Nicho: “Don’t cheer too loudly cos there is still more to come oh yes, because my good self Nicho “Z” is going to be teaming with the 4 time World Champ, Jonny Stripes”

The crowd cheers very loudly for both men

Nicho: “And it is going to be against the tag team champions, World Class Chumps, Joey and Julio”

The crowd boos very loudly for the tag champs, but Joey simply gives them the finger

Nicho: “But we got one last match and I think this is the really big one of the night. The captains of Holocaust and Genesis clash in the main event for the World Heavyweight Championship!”

The crowd goes crazy wild for this last announcement but Matt Hare doesn’t look pleased at all. “In the End plays” out and Nicho walks to the back as the 16 men and women point and talk trash about their opponents

-----------------------------

****Commercial Break****

[nicho]

“Alright” by Supergrass hits the speakers in the arena just as the crew workers finish attaching the barbed wire to the last ring post. Matt Hare walks out from the back with his World Title shining as it rests on his right shoulder. Behind him comes a reluctant a Julio, who seems to be in awe of the two mammoth towers above the ring. Matt pats him on the shoulder and whispers something into his ear, to which Julio nods.

JJ: “Looks like a bit of last minute game plan being discussed here between these two men. Remember they are former tag team champions, but I gotta say, I’m not sure how much benefit orthodox tag teaming will be in a deathmatch environment”

Tom C: “Yep, World Class Line Up have definitely got there backs against the wall tonight. They are facing not only Disturbed, who is without argument the greatest of all DUEW superstars in the Deathmatch department but they are facing Jonny Stripes, a one time Deathmatch champion and the DUEW King of the Deathmatch for 2005”

JJ: “That tournament is of course approaching us soon and it is interesting to note that Jonny Stripes won’t be defending his crown in the tournament”

Tom C: “That’s right, he is going to be facing either his opponent tonight, Matt Hare or his tag partner, Disturbed, for the World Heavyweight Title that very night”

Matt and Julio have made their way to the ring and are standing at the base of the tower furthest from the ramp. Julio is staring at the barbed wire net set up in the ring and asks Hare a question. Hare responds with a nod, to which Julios face becomes more timid

“Kashmir” by Led Zepellin plays through the arena and Jonny Stripes comes out to a medium sized cheer. He doesn’t wait for formalities but instead just marches to the ring and stands at the base of the other tower

JJ: “Well he is all business tonight, I guess he’s looking for some revenge against Hare”

Tom C: “A lot of the focus going into this match has been on Disturbeds deathmatch record, but you have to remember, Disturbed often wrestles not under deathmatch conditions, but under hardcore ones. I think that Disturbed is going to revel in the chance to show off his Deathmatch ability in this match”

While Tom was talking “Bound” by Disturbed has hit the P.A and Disturbed has come out, jumping up and down to entertain the fans. He starts to march down the ramp at quite a fast pace and is halfway down when he rips off his title and raises it to the crowd, causing them to go wild

JJ: “It is astonishing how much these fans love Disturbed, isn’t it Tom?”

Tom C: “It certainly is but at the end of the day we are here to wrestle and that’s the bottom line. Its not a popularity contest, it’s a test of strength, stamina and smarts, that’s what is gonna win the matches and the titles”

Disturbed has come down to the ring and has gone up to Jonny Stripes and whispers something in his ear. Jonny nods and the two men make their way around side by side to Matt and Julio. They are met just around the corner and a fistfight ensues, which Jonny and Disturbed easily win. They start to single out Julio and have taken him to the guard railing and are hitting punches on him one at a time

JJ: “This is why I think Jonny and Dizzy have this won in the bag, they got a smashmouth style well suited to the match”

Disturbed has pulled Julio to his feet and Irish whips him into the guard rail and goes to follow him but gets floored by Hare, who has flown from the 1st level of the tower to hit a diving cross body. Hare tries to bounce back quickly and get up but Jonny has him covered and snaps him back by the hair into the guard railing

Tom C: “Well if that move by Hare isn’t on the DUEW 2006 Highlights list then I don’t know what will be, because that is awesome”

The fans have started up a small “This is awesome” chant and are getting into the match early. Jonny helps Dizzy to his feet and asks him if he’s ok. Dizzy shakes Jonny away and goes to find Julio and begins stomping away on him wildly when he does. Jonny turns to Hare and begins to punch him around the mats on the outside for a bit. Jonny then takes Hare to the ring and slams his head into the apron. He goes to do the same again but Hare avoids it by hitting an elbow to the gut and then slamming Jonnys head into it

JJ: “Hare has probably bought himself some time there and it is time that he definitely needed”

On the other side of the ring Julio has gained an advantage with a boot to Disturbed’s head and has begun to climb the ladder of the tower. Disturbed however is straight back on him and gets under him and pulls him off the ladder, ready to powerbomb him but Julio twists his body and hurricanranas Disturbed, sending him into the announcers table

JJ: “Lucky he didn’t go flying over the top of us then Tom, otherwise we’d be toast”

Tom C: “Somehow I can see our table being broken tonight JJ”

On the otherside of the ring Hare has got a small bit of the barbed wire net free and is grinding it into Stripes forehead, slowly making a bigger cut. Jonny gathers up all the strength he can muster and breaks free, sending Matt flying backwards. As Matt comes running back Jonny dodges and helps him go flying into the ringpost, getting wiped out in the process

JJ: “Oh my! Hare just got knocked silly by a bit of fast footwork from Jonny”

Tom C: “That’s right, but you can’t forget Jonny is now cut open and bleeding from his head after that barbed wire got introduced to his skull”

JJ: “But at least he bought himself some time here. Meanwhile we’ve got Disturbed and Julio fighting it out right in front of us here”

Julio has Dizzy reeling and is simply hitting him on any part of his body. He has him backed up against the tower and is hitting him with forearms and fists to the back. Disturbed is trying to cover himself from the blows and eventually he breaks free and tosses Julio into the tower

JJ: “Nicely done by Disturbed there and now he is going up the tower and Julio is following him”

As the two men climb the tower Matt and Jonny start to do the same on the other side. All four men eventually make their way to the middle of each tower and are fighting it out to knock the other onto the barbed wire net. Jonny has Hare right on the edge and goes for a haymaker to knock him off but Hare ducks and darts to Jonnys blindside. Just as Jonny turns around he gets hit by a Superkick and goes off of the edge and bounces down onto the barbed wire

JJ: “Oh my dear Lord! Jonny is lying on the barbed wire and his body must be so torn up from such a fall”

Meanwhile on the other tower Disturbed has just slammed Julio’s head into the pole on the side of the tower. Julio is stumbling about and Disturbed picks him up for a scoop slam. He has him on his shoulder and is about to throw him down but Julio slips out the back and then quickly hits a reverse DDT onto the platform. Julio quickly motions to Hare and he nods back at him

JJ: “What kind of plan are these two hatching?”

Julio has gotten Disturbed to his feet and whips him off of the tower and down onto the barbed wire. Hare looks down at the net and sees Jonny and Dizzy lying next to each other. He gives himself the sign of the cross and dives off and hits the Last Croak on both men.

Tom C: “Oh my God, I have never in my life seen such a crazy move”

JJ: “Well Hare certainly gained some respect from me just then and judging by the fans reaction, I think he got some from them too”

The crowd are chanting “HOLY SHIT” over and over as the three men struggle to free themselves from the barbed wire. Julio has climbed down and is helping Hare out and he is the first free from the netting. Julio goes under the ring and pulls out a vast array of weapons as Hare sits down on the ring steps to take a breather.

JJ: “Well Disturbed and Jonny are just about free now but I pity the fact that on the other side of the ring Julio has pulled out an entire arsenal of weapons”

Julio is setting up one of three tables he pulled from under the ring and stops to look at it the weapons he has mustered. There is a stack of cookie sheets of varied sizes, two chairs, a kendo stick, a small ladder and 2x4 wooden stick. He has set up the table and looks quite proud of himself but soon the smile is taken off of his face as Disturbed comes flying from under the barbed wire net, through the ropes to hit a cross body type move on Julio, crunching him through the table as he does so.

JJ: “Disturbed came out of nowhere there! And whats this, its Jonny!”

Hare has gotten up to help Julio but Jonny gets there first and grabs a chair and flings it at Hares head, sending him stumbling backwards. Jonny follows him up and rolls him onto the ring steps he was just sitting on. He follows him up there and holds him between his legs while Disturbed comes over with a table.

JJ: “No way! They can’t be thinking of doing this, it’ll break Hare in half!”

Tom C: “I don’t think they really care about that at the moment Jon”

Disturbed has set up the table and an evil look comes over Jonnys face. He lifts Hare up and throws him down from the stairs, hitting a devastating powerbomb through the table. The crowd has started chanting “This is awesome” again and Jonny and Dizzy are lapping it up. Jonny jumps down and goes for the cover and the ref starts the count but Disturbed pulls Jonny up

JJ: “What is he doing? He doesn’t want to start a fight with his own partner, does he?”

Jonny gets into Dizzys face and starts shouting at him and shoves him. Disturbed shoves him back and shouts to him something. Jonnys face goes from anger to a smile. Jonny slaps Disturbeds hand and they go and grab Julio. Disturbed takes Julio to the guard rail and slams his head into it, before going to get the third table. In the meantime Jonny has climbed up to the middle of the tower and is looking down at Disturbed, who has lined up Julio with the table

JJ: “They couldn’t be, is this it? Are they going for the patented BOD finished, the Destroyer?”

Tom C: “It looks like they are…oh but hang on, Hare just interrupted that. After going through that table I didn’t think he would have anything left”

Hare has somehow made his way to the middle of the platform and has stopped Jonny with a knee to the gut. Hare grabs Jonny by the hair and starts running for a flying one handed bulldog but Jonny simply hits a kidney punch and Hare goes flying off without Jonny, landing arse first on the barbed wire netting.

JJ: “This is it, Disturbed is ready again to do it and so is Jonny…he flies off…and hits it!”

Jonny has dived from the middle of the tower and has hit a diving clothesline on Julio, just as Dizzy brings him down for a spinebuster. The table breaks and Dizzy drops to the floor and covers for the 3 count

Tom C: “Jonny and Disturbed have won the match with their old BOD finisher, with a hardcore twist. Julio is out cold, Hare is tangled in barbed wire but the greatest tag team in DUEW history has prevailed and are standing strong”

Jonny and Disturbed approach each other and look into each others eyes. Jonny grabs Dizzys hand and raises it in the air. The two men shake hands and climb onto the announcers table, paying tribute to the fans, who are chanting “BOD, BOD, BOD” over and over again

JJ: “Well what a story, two former best friends coming together again and it is a beautiful sight!’

Disturbed turn to hug Jonny but as he does so Jonny kicks him in the stomach and lifts him quickly. He slams him back down and hits a Sit Down Powerbomb on him, breaking the announcers table.

JJ: “What the hell? Jonny has turned on Disturbed again!”

Tom C: “I told you our table would be broken tonight, but I didn’t think that this fragile friendship would be broken too!”

Jonny has gotten up and looks at Disturbeds prone body in disgust as the show closes with a shot of Disturbed out cold on the remains of the table